50 years ago, if you were feeling a little frisky and your lover was miles away, it meant grabbing a pen, writing a steamy letter, sealing it with a kiss, and then waiting agonisingly for weeks —praying your partner got the message before your desire cooled off. The anticipation was excruciating, and by the time you got a reply, the excitement often got lost in the mail.

Fast forward to today, and all that has changed. Now, with just a tap on your phone, you can send a risky message that leaves them breathless in seconds. But don’t be fooled—hitting them with an “I want to tear your clothes off and take you on this table right now” out of nowhere might not get the reaction you’re hoping for. Instead, it might prompt a confused “Are you okay?” or “Do you need help?” reply. Building anticipation is an art, and here’s how you turn up the heat of phone sex without burning out too quickly.

1. Set the Mood

Before you even pick up the phone to dial your other half, you’ve got to set the stage for yourself. After all, feeling sexy and confident is half the fun of phone sex or even sexting. Everyone has their own way of getting in the mood, so let’s explore a few irresistible ideas to get in the mood.

Start by treating yourself to a long, steamy bath—let the warm water relax every inch of you while you imagine what’s to come. For the ladies, some like to get all dolled up—think sexy lingerie that makes you feel unstoppable, a little makeup to highlight your best features and hair that’s begging to be pulled. Some men prefer the ease of slipping into their comfiest clothes, the ones that make you feel like you’re wrapped in luxury.

Add a glass (or two) of wine to loosen up, and let the buzz help you sink deeper into the moment. Set the scene with some candles or incense to fill the air with sultry scents, making every breath feel decadent. And don’t forget to have a sex toy or two ready to add a little extra fun into the mix—you never know when the mood might strike, and it’s always better to be prepared.

2. Start with Flirty Texts

Instead of diving straight into sending that steamy photo, you can also test the waters with a few playful, suggestive texts to build up the anticipation. Tease a little, hint at what’s on your mind, and see how your partner responds. If they’re biting, you’ll know it’s safe to take things further one flirty message at a time.

These texts can start as soon as the day begins. A morning message with a compliment, a shared inside joke, or a teasing hint about what you’re looking forward to is enough to spark that excitement. Heading out for the day? Drop a playful line about that hot red lacy underwear underneath your outfit or a quick “Wish you were here... can’t stop thinking about your soft kisses…” to keep them thinking of you.

Little by little, your texts build a story that only gets hotter as the day progresses.

3. Use Your Imagination

Remember, phone sex (or any other sexual activity)—gets even hotter when you let your imagination run wild. Start the conversation on a playful note and let it flow toward something more naughty. Try to be as descriptive as possible - talk about fantasies or desires that turn you on, describing everything you’d be doing if they were right there with you.

From the way you're touching yourself to how you imagine them touching you, the more detail the better! For example, you could text, “I’m lying in bed, wearing only your favourite lingerie. I keep thinking about wrapping my hands around your huge cock…” Or, if you’re on the phone, you could whisper, “Close your eyes and imagine me naked beside you, with my hands slowly caressing your breasts and feeling your nipples getting harder and harder”.

Descriptive language adds depth to the entire phone sex experience, making it feel as though you’re right there together, sharing every sensation.

Lady wearing lingerie on the bed

4. Experiment with Voice

When the moment transitions to a phone call, your voice becomes a powerful instrument of pleasure. Play around with different tones—try a soft, slow whisper, or a confident, dominant tone that makes their heart skip a beat. Use pauses to create suspense, letting them feel the buildup in each moment.

For instance, you can say, “Do you have any idea what you do to me? Every time I picture your hot, naked body, I can feel my cock throbbing for you…” and then let your voice trail off, keeping them hanging on every word. Encourage your partner to respond and let you hear their excitement too. This creates a shared rhythm and intimacy that brings you both to that wonderful edge!

5. Incorporate Props

If you’re feeling adventurous, props can take your experience to the next level. Whether it’s a penis sleeve that feels just like her or a clit sucker that makes you think about his tongue, props make the experience more vivid and immersive. You could send a cheeky picture of a prop with a message like, “Look what I have waiting for you…”

On a call, you could say, “I’m gently tracing my toy on my clit, and I can feel myself getting so wet for you..” or “You may be cumming in your penis sleeve tonight but it'll be me you're cumming in this weekend”. It’s an enticing way to add layers to your fantasy.

6. Build Up to the Climax

In these moments, it’s all about the journey. Savour the thrill, and take your time rather than rushing to the climax. Allow each interaction, each word, to heighten the anticipation. Let your partner know what feels good, guiding them with words like, “I want you to touch yourself for me, Tell me what you’re doing” or That’s perfect, keep going and cum for me”

The slower and more intentional the buildup, the more rewarding the climax will be.

Phone sex or sexting is all about exploring and discovering what lights you both up. Experiment with different ways to connect—not just through calls, but maybe a cheeky video chat or some hot photos to make things even more exciting. The goal is to find what makes you feel closest to your partner, no matter the distance.

And if you are looking to incorporate toys into your relationship, explore Horny.sg for a range of toys and accessories to bring your fantasies to life. Check out our website today to know more!